The D Spot

Monica (can be Ate Mox) will be graduating tomorrow from the Ateneo Law School, with second honors! The family is very happy for her achievement.

I am introducing Monica–to somehow serve as an inspiration. Here is sharing her story–to let you know, dear parents, and you dear students, that it is not too late for anything. If you want to make that change in your children, you can make it (even if it takes a miracle for it to happen). If you want to make that change in you, you can make it. If you want to excel in school, you can. There is no excuse for anything, all you need is determination, and complete trust in the good Lord.

Meet Monica

For those of you who do not know her yet, she is the second child in a family of 7 siblings (first daughter among 3). In grade school, high school, college and even her first 2 years in Law School, she has not excelled academically (and that she admits).

Yes, Monica got some awards in pre-school, the usual awards, like “Most Friendly”, “Most Cooperative”, or what have you. At that time, with only 2 kids, we her parents were already on a high for such awards. She went to St. James near PhilAm, in the vicinity where SM North and Trinoma are now located. My mother, who then used to bring her to school had to think of many things just for her to go to school. My mother would promise to buy her a goldfish on the way home from school, look for tadpoles or even frogs, short of bribing her. And I would promise her pink ribbons, pink shoes, pink dresses–anything pink!

From Pre-School Through College

When she was in grade school in St. Theresa’s College, we would think of many reasons just for her to wake up in time for the school bus’ arrival, like, Mang Sinoy the barangay captain was on his way to the house to pick up kids who did not like to go to school. Or, the household help would be buzzing the doorbell to signal that there were people outside who were asking if there were kids in the house who have not gone to school. Sometimes, we would run out of alibis or reasons, and she would just like sleep the whole morning, unmotivated to go to school.

In grade school, she would have grades ranging from the 70s to the 80s to the 90s–so inconsistent, just like in high school. She would excel in one subject this year, and have low grades in another, then it would be the other way round in the next academic year. However, she failed at least one subject during the first two quarters–be it history class, or religion, or math. She especially hated math and still claims until now that she does not know how to divide without a calculator! Still, we did not mind–what was important was that year after year, she would pass and not repeat the level or get kicked out.

She studied from prep til high school in St. Theresa’s College STC)– she wanted to attend Miriam or Poveda because those were the popular schools a that time. But I told her that the best school so far if you want to excel in English, in writing and in speech was STC. Monica writes very well, and so do others I know who graduated from STC. Once in grade school, she and 2 others in her group were contestants for a Science Quiz. How proud we were to see them win. Monica was part of the school’s debate team in high school.

In high school, she had a social life different from her sisters–was not allowed to go to parties or talk to boys. Thus, she joined all sorts of activities to be able to circumvent this rule: she joined the debate team because the debate society was coed, she attended the Summer Enrichment Program (she dubbed it Soiree Everyday Program) in Ateneo, and attended the annual fairs and dances that Ateneo H.S. held. She looked forward to attending Side A, Freestyle or South Border with her high school barkada. In college, she even spent thousands to get a ticket to an F4 concert (which I frown to until now. But she always says–the experience was worth it).

A Difficult Child

Truth was, there were times that raising Monica was very difficult (very very difficult)–we knew that all it would take was a miracle for her to change. Monica, during her growing years, especially after her short stint with “Ang TV” (the most popular kids’ and teens’ show at that time) has become a very difficult child, a child whom many parents would not like other people to know. Showbiz exposure is not meant for all people. With her stint at “Ang TV”, she became very popular in school, until school authorities asked her to stop. This probably made her a difficult child. Yes, it took lots of prayers, and as my friends said–a miracle, for her to change. After so many years, she has totally changed.

In college, she had the time of her life, enjoying her college days, not in school, but with friends. She loved making short films, scripts, and TV productions, but ignored academics and skipped class most of the time. She and her group mates were the school’s representatives to the Catholic Mass Media Awards, where they were finalists in one short film category. She joined the PEP Squad, which competed and won awards. Nights were spent training and rehearsing, not studying. Nothing extra-ordinary, nothing much to tell. Her grades, again ranged from the highest to the lowest (she failed Theology, of all the subjects!). When she graduated, my husband and I were content to sit in the chairs available for all parents. There were special seats for honor students, which we were so used to sitting on with our boys who went to the Ateneo. Still we were happy, we had fine dinner after that to celebrate her college graduation.

She decided to go to either Law School or take up a medical course immediately after college. My husband and I gamely agreed–despite her so-so college experience and grades. We fully supported her, though we thought that she wanted to pursue her studies, only so that she won’t have to go to work yet. She was only 20 then.

The Change–from a difficult child

Monica has evolved from a difficult child to a daughter who is very pleasing to her parents’ eyes, to her siblings’ eyes, and I guess in the eyes of her friends. Most of all, in the eyes of God. She is prayerful, missed only one Sunday Mass in her whole life, which was my fault. I brought her with me to Bangladesh, where she had her OJT in the Dhaka Sheraton Hotel. As Sunday was a working day in Dhaka, I entirely forgot that she was waiting for me, for us to go to church). That’s past now, God I am sure did not take that incident against me, nor against her–He is a loving and understanding God.

Going to Law School

It was a big investment for us, financially, emotionally, even physically, to send Monica to the Ateneo Law School in Rockwell (We live in Quezon City). In between, she was brought by a driver to school, and most days for 5 years, she would take the cab-MRT-cab to Rockwell, then back. Yes, she took the course in 5 years–it was comfortable for her that way. During her first 2 years in Law School, she did not care much. Her grades were just right, not outstanding. She even cried at times because of the massive workload. In her first week, she saw the stack of cases (about 2 feet high) for her Constitutional Law class. She assumed that it was the caseload for the whole semester, and was in disbelief when she found out that it was merely the reading for the next day! She dropped subjects left and right, made her unique schedule, opting to create her own five-year program, using advice she got from friends from the upper classes.

Until the change, the great change. She took her third year seriously, found out that she could get very high grades, Even her classmates did not take her seriously in the beginning. She was known for her funny antics in recitations. At home, she would read hundreds of pages every day. She would forego so many things, like going to concerts of her favorite stars, for once in a lifetime visit to the country, or family gigs. There have been times when she asked her boyfriend if they could go on a “study” date instead of a”date” date. Her studies have to come first, though Sunday Mass was always a priority.

Then grades started coming in, high written tests, high oral tests, high final grades. Each semester, she would update a spreadsheet, which calculated her standing. It was her basis for the grades that she was to target for the next semesters. Her aim: to graduate with honors, and to be in the TOP 20 of the graduating batch.

And after years of working hard–she has attained her dream. She will be graduating with honors–2nd honors, ranked #18. She is very happy, we are more than happy. Monica is such a blessing to us, her family, in the same way as her 6 other siblings are.

CONGRATULATIONS, Mox. Thanks for making us proud, and good luck–our prayers are for you! We LOVE you, and always will!!!

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