Ingat–Just What Does It Mean?
Posted on May 24, 2008
Filed Under LIFE, Thoughts | Viewed 1019 times
I went to Trinoma yesterday afternoon to meet a former office mate who wanted some advice—she has just resigned from her writing and editing job. She said she wanted to concentrate on rearing her small child, and would like to write blogs and conduct parenting workshops as she has a lot to share. Then I met Mica who does part time work with us and and one of my virtual assistants for some bonding moments. Last stop was Krispy Kreme where we checked our emails (cool, as they give their password for the day to their clients for free wifi).
Ouch!
I took a cab home (it seems I am the only one among my friends who do not know or have the desire to learn to drive), and before I knew it, I was asleep—I should not be doing this. A very good friend has just asked me earlier, “Do you ever sleep?”. Yes, I said, isn’t sleeping in the cab sleeping? I was home too soon, very careful when I got off the cab, as it was drizzling and there was mud in the driveway. I was not sleepy nor was there alcohol in my system, but before I knew it, my foot was caught by something like a trap, that I tripped and fell, my face almost flat on the floor, the 2 boxes of Krispy Kreme donuts out of my hands. Luckily, I had the instinct such that my palms were on the floor, not my face, with Sexy MacBook undamaged. I was mudded all over, and yes, in pain.
My household helper was quick enough to open the gate, helped me walk and sat me down, with BA and Alan Jr looking for Betadine to clean my bruises, Only when Moochie our golden retriever was all over me, licking blood—yes, blood gushing from my big toe did I learn of the extent of my bruises, in both knees, both feet, the palms of my hands, my arms and fingers (still I was lucky, as my face was unhurt). BA poured alcohol on my bruises, and I was crying in pain. I went to take a cold bath, despite my helper’s insistence that I take a hot bath. She was right, in 2 minutes, I had chills. I needed help in dressing up. Psychological perhaps, but even hours after I had my bruises covered with Bactroban, I was still wearing a jacket on a warm summer night. I was sure that the next day, I would be black and blue in many parts.
And yes, just minutes before the accident, I got a text message from my daughter Chato, saying “I love you po” after allowing her to stay longer with friends, from hubby who said “love you, ingat” after telling him where I was, and Monica, at the nick of time just before the fall, saying “Ingat, Mom”.
Which reminds me…
A few days ago, I was intrigued by a priest’s sermon in UP. The Reading for that day had “love” as its main topic. He quoted a lot of verses about love, Love is patient and kind, love is…I thought he would say that love is blind. He did not.
Until he posed the question of how does one tell a loved one that he or she loves him or her. Filipinos, he said generally do not say “I love you”. I was not convinced in the beginning, because in my family, we always say “I love you”, or “labyu” at any given opportunity. Later, I realized that it could be true. I myself, nor my siblings did not hear the words “I love you” from my parents, while were growing up—it was awkward at that time, nor did we say it aloud, except for writing the words in cards when we were asked in school to prepare cards or letters for our parents. Or when we wrote them in greeting cards. Daughter Pauline rarely says “I love you”, but when she says our shouts it, she really means it.
Saying “I love you”
So, how does a Filipino say, “I love you”, the priest asked again. In many different ways—actions speak louder than words, we know for sure. He said that for most Filipinos, “I love you” is equivalent to “Ingat”, or “Ingat ka”. Culturally, perhaps, this is an easier way of saying “I love you”.
I also saw how in the TV show, Wow Wowie, the host would urge the contestants or some of the members of the audience to say “I love you” to their relatives. There would always be emotional moments when they would say the magic words. They would then both cry. A mother once said that she could not say those words to her children because she was not used to saying them, even if deep in her heart, her love for her children is there.
We do not realize it, but how many times do we say, “Ingat” in a day. How many times do we use it as a closing statement in text messages or emails. Or in finishing off a telephone call. Or bidding good bye to a loved one and friends, or even perhaps to one you just met, or having a few minutes association. Do we really mean it from the heart? Or is it just routine?
“Ingat” can mean nothing, but yes, it can mean something when saying it with fondness, when saying it out of love.
How about you, just what does “ingat” mean?
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Dine Racoma is Sexy Mom, a Filipina doing what she likes best—writing, her passion. She writes freelance, does research, advises on new media, and manages a virtual assistance office for home-based jobs. A mother of 7 (what joy!) foremost, a wife, MIL, grandma to 2 pretty girls and an angel in heaven, sister, daughter, friend. Was in the corporate world for 27 years, the first 5 as Executive Secretary to an affiliate of the country’s biggest drug chain, and the last 22 as an international civil servant in an international development bank with HQ in Manila. Traveled extensively to many countries bringing about rich experiences and lessons learned to share with dear Readers. All these—in The D Spot
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Your fall must be painful. I remember too when I tripped on something and broke my ankle leaving me in a wheelchair and crutches for 2 months.( I actually took that time to start a second business.)
Ingat for me is looking down on where I step, surveying the perimeter to see if there is a hole nearby that can cause me to trip.
hope you’re feeling better now. and i think you are right, we hear and read ‘ingat’ all over. i think this word is the subtle word for ‘i love you’ talaga. in our family, it was only when i left the nest to live in another country that ‘i love you’s’ flowed. i hear them even from my macho brothers
but my father, still have difficulties when confronted with those ‘i love you’s’ – although with his apos; he’d immediately say it back 
ouchie indeed! how are you now? i hope you don’t have pilay.
i always say ingat to family and friends, right before we go our separate ways. i guess it’s my way of saying i care about you so much so you have to take care of yourself bec i want to see you again
i almost never say ingat to others. well, sometimes i guess when they tell me “ingat” and i reply “ingat ka rn” back at them.
but the words sound weird to me somehow as i feel that’s insulting someone’s intelligence. why? do you need to be reminded to be careful? moreover, even if you need to, as far as i know, hearing people telling me “ingat ka” doesn’t make me more careful. seems to be it’s just equivalent to “goodbye” or “i just don’t have anything more to say so i’ll just say ingat”
and if you want to say “i love you,” then say it. even if it feels awkward or weird. the overcoming of that awkwardness or weirdness just deepens your “i love you.” coz if it didn’t feel awkward or weird, then it mustn’t have taken you any effort to say it, thus making it a little bit more meaningless.
ang haba ng comment. and you don’t know me pa naman. :p but hello, i’ve been reading your blog since i saw it because of the up-ateneo thing. haha
Hi! Ms. Dine, be careful next time and always watch your step, dont worry you still look attractive and gorgeous after 7 kids and grandkids and even if you have bruises, we’re on the same boat only i have 5 grandchildren. Nameet mo na si raquel, pag uwi namin sana magkita rin tayo. cool mom an2nette of germany
Oh boy..I hope you’re ok now. That was a nasty fall.
It’s funny kasi just this evening the security guard at Red Ribbon bid us a very nice “Ingat po!” as we were leaving. I even joked my husband na close na pala sila. I guess it comes naturally to most Pinoys to say that…even to strangers.
Ingat po lagi, next time.
For me, when I say “Ingat” to someone special (but they don’t know they’re special), it really means “I love you so so so so much
”
Hehe. I wish lang they know that.
I think I also said “ingat” before we parted ways.
You were really sleepy yesterday tapos ang dami niyo pa man din dala.
I think yung high heels nakacontribute sa paghulog ninyo. Maybe you should wear flat shoes or kahit slippers na lang on rainy days kasi mahirap na lalo na you were sleepy pa that time.
Ingat palagi Tita. Buti hindi kayo masyadong naano tsaka buti andun yung 2 cute angels mo
Well I’m glad you’re fine now mam Dine. Perhaps it’s time you really need to take more rest and sleep.
The priest is right, culturally, we Filipinos are more comfortable in saying “ingat ka” than “I love you.” because those words are still foreign to us. Since saying it is driven by emotions, and we Filipinos are amongst the most caring peoples in the world, we are much much comfortable in expressing our care for one another in our mother tongue.
And we don’t say “mahal kita” that often because “mahal” is much known to mean “expensive” in English. The closest translation of “love” in Pilipino is “pag-ibig” and we also do not say “iniibig kita” that often because for us, strangely enough, it’s reserved for the ones we really love. In other words, it’s more formal, hence it’s reserved for special moments for our significant others.
Hence we use the expression, “Magingat ka” or “Ingat ka” to almost anyone from friends to new acquaintances instead.
(Wow, I still remember my Filipino Anthropology class! :D)
Lastly, ingat po kayo lagi mam.
Ouch!
The fall must’ve been really horrible. I do hope that the bruises and cuts aren’t hurting you that much tita. Hopefully, it’ll heal soon!
In my family, we don’t say “mahal kita” to each other and didn’t grow up w/that phrase either. I guess in some Asian families, they tend to keep such senti phrases in their heart rather than saying it out loud to a person. Pero, mom always tell me to take care whenever we have a phone conversation. I do the same too. Or I’ll ask my siblings to take care of her … Hehe. I use the word “ingat” more than often b/c I care about people whom I’m acquainted w/.
Now, ingat po! Hugs!
Hope you’re feeling a lot better now…. INGAT!
yes, to say,,,,,I love you….....it is hard for me say….kasi hindi ko narinig or used to heard it sa parents ko or sa family ko sa Pinas.
what we alwasy says,,,,,ingat….take care…”pagbantay”-bisaya,
sa mga anak ko n bernie says this always…..what makes me shock….kasi sabi nila….
Ako daw, hindi nila narinig palagi ang:::ICH LIEBE DICH….I love You….which i always hear sa kanilang 3…..lalo na lalabas or aalis sila sa bahay.
while reading your Post….naala-ala ko, n think it over.,.,OO nga…....totoo, what you say,
INGAT…........I LOVE YOU…...ito lang I always say to Bernie, Kim n Sascha.
Ingat kayo…....God bless…........ito ang lagi kong sabi sa kanila.
So, INGAT…....instead of saying this::::I LOVE YOU…...
INGAT, dine…........I love you!
it can happen to anyone, young or old. i have tripped my ankle so many times but i always managed to avoid the fall even with flat shoes. accidents happen. and i am glad you beautiful face and your ever reliable sexymac were unharmed.
Oh, Dine, I hope you are OK. Andiyan naman si VB, just in case, di ba?
I’ve never used the word “Ingat” until my 2nd son got married 6 years ago and his wife started introducing it to our house vocab. The more she said it to hubby and me every time we’re about to leave house (theirs or ours) the more I like the sound. So now, we’ve replaced the phrase “Take care” with “ingat” as our bye-byes.
I hope you’re on the mend from that mishap
“Ingat” lagi…
Naku, ingat ka ha and please do not forget not to sleep in the cab =)
Ingat is take care. But you’re musings are right. It can mean a lot of things; depends on who’s saying it and who the person is saying it to. =)
I (always) say “ingat” to friends, family who are going somewhere, and when I do, I mean it as take care and God be with you.
Ingat means a lot of things: be careful to not get hurt (nor sleep in a cab; I love you and I do not want anything bad to happen to you; please be careful for when you are hurt, i am too. Parang ganun po.
So Dine, ingat. One way to do that is to get enough sleep.
Have a great week
hope you feel better now, without the bruises.
re: i love you. i always find it corny when my mom tells me that, or write on a card.. i don’t think i’ve said that magic word to my parents.. ewan, but im sure they know that i love and care for them.. i seldom utter the word.. except to louna every night..