The Joy of Being a Mother (Pre-Retirement)
Posted on November 8, 2006
Filed Under Parenting and Family | Viewed 5073 times
Mommy, mama, mom, ma, mum, any which way – mother. the sweetest name one can hear from her child; being a mother – the essence of being a woman.
I write this series to share with you my experiences as a mother, seven times over. I can imagine the expression of shock of those who do not know me. Nowadays, having seven children is a phenomenon, rarely heard of. Motherhood for me is a full-time job, with my 8 am-5 pm office work as my “break”. The many responsibilities of a mother could not match that of the structured responsibilities at work.
L-R: Alan Jr, Chato, BA, Pauline, Vincent, Monica
I am mother to seven children: J. Angelo (26), Monica Rose (22), Bernard Alan (18), Vincent Paolo (17), Angela Marie Rosario (15), Pauline Rose (13) and Alan, Jr. (10). So there, with children of various ages, 1 married, 1 in law school, 1 in college, 3 in high school, and 1 in grade school (now, add 2 toddlers, 3 and 1-1/2 as grandchildren), I can relate to almost anyone,. Each child has his/her own personality, each child his/her own weaknesses and strengths. I am lucky for having my mother to look after my kids when I am at work and a supportive husband, who has stood by me in raising my children. By the time I come home from work, my mother takes her exit, and I take over, meaning, I have the children all to myself.
Pia, Angelo, Caren and Cate
My children are independent in terms of school work – they do their homework either in school or immediately upon reaching home. You may not believe it, but the small one in grade school does not even review for his exams! At the end of the quarterly exams, they would bring home high test scores, which would be reflected in their cards – they are even honor students. My eldest son was a scholar at the Ateneo High School before he joined the School of Economics at the University of the Philippines. He worked for 2 years with the National Economic and Development authority, 1-1/2 years with a private IT firm, and now, a professional blogger, tech evangelist and mew media consultant. My eldest daughter was a member of the high school debate team, the college pep squad, and is now reaping good grades at the Ateneo College of Law. One son is in the University of the Philippines, School of Statistics, another is in the Ateneo High School, the youngest one at the Claret School. Two girls are in high school at the Miriam College. I have no secret. It is perhaps just that I never forced school to my children. Later, I’ll tell you how.
Day in and day out, my children and I never tire of each other. It is a delight to receive at least 7 kisses and embraces, each in his/her own way, rushing in excitement, immediately upon reaching home and opening the sliding door. It is a delight to feel the warmth of their love, and all the day’s cares and troubles are washed away. We never run out of activities. On weekdays, nothing fancy, nothing expensive – we just listen to each others’ stories, watch TV or videos, listen to music, surf the internet, play computer, board and card games, bake cookies, etc. The children also play the piano and guitar, sing, dance, act, draw, paint, whatever – no structured schedules. I have always been patient with my children. They are free to do or group themselves as they want. Before we retire to bed, we pray as a family.
On weekends, we go to the big park, the Quezon Memorial Circle where we can spend the whole morning biking, picnicking, strolling, lazing under the trees, or during windy afternoons, we go kiting. Sometimes, we also go to the village park. We also go to the malls for a good time, shopping, window shopping, watching movies, dining. Sometimes, just sometimes, we go to the malls’ amusement centers. Of course, one has to spend, but these outings need not necessarily be expensive. There is also home, where we can simply laze around and enjoy each others’ company.
If you ask me, who my favorite child is, I have a ready answer. He/She who at the moment is the most troubled, hurt, pained or sick, he/she who needs my attention most because of some difficulties or circumstances, is my favorite. I know my children have always received and felt the security they so needed at the proper time and place. We may not be financially well-off, but if you take a look at my children, you will see in their eyes and faces the contentment, the laughter, the joy, the happiness, the warmth, and the security which money cannot buy.
7 children, 7 personalities, each his/her own character – but one thing they do have in common – their mom! I may not be able to give them my full time, my equal attention, but they are assured and they feel it in their hearts that they have me to whom they can always turn to. It is not only they who derive strength from me – I derive strength from them, knowing that I need to be there when they need me. I need to keep myself healthy, in high spirits and most of all morally upright, as they look up to me as the most important person in their lives. I may not be supermom, but I try to give my best to my children.
My house may not be perfect, spic and span. Here and there, there will be books, comic books, toys, candy wrappers, and cookie bits, and various traces of children’s activities. I don’t mind at all. I have come to believe that “A happy home is better than a clean house”. My home. At the end of the day, when all are asleep, I watch my children, and I can’t help but thank God for these 7 gifts, these 7 blessings. It’s also a joy to wake up hearing one whisper or shout “Mommy” in your child’s dreams even though it’s deep in the night.
I may not be an expert or authority in parenting, but I hope to share my experiences with you. Please feel free to write and share yours, too.
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12 Responses to “The Joy of Being a Mother (Pre-Retirement)”
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About Me
Dine Racoma is Sexy Mom, a Filipina doing what she likes best—writing, her passion. She writes freelance, does research, advises on new media, and manages a virtual assistance office for home-based jobs. A mother of 7 (what joy!) foremost, a wife, MIL, grandma to 2 pretty girls and an angel in heaven, sister, daughter, friend. Was in the corporate world for 27 years, the first 5 as Executive Secretary to an affiliate of the country’s biggest drug chain, and the last 22 as an international civil servant in an international development bank with HQ in Manila. Traveled extensively to many countries bringing about rich experiences and lessons learned to share with dear Readers. All these—in The D Spot
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wow, that’s a very inspiring article. I can relate a little, i am a mother of 3, aged 4,3 and 9 months too. What i’m thinking right now is, will i become a good mother like you? i wish and pray that God will guide me in guiding my kids..
Raziel – it is not really a question of “will i become a good mother?”. what matters is “one tries her best to be one”. good luck, and God bless you.
Supermom ka kaya.
wow. interesting. congratulation on your retirement. wish you all the luck.
Being a mother is the highest salaried job all mothers like us have because the payment is pure love.
Your site is interesting. Keep it up. Wish you all the luck
You seem to be a perfect mother! You are very good in time management and full of LOVE. The challenges of 7 “puberty” doesn’t show on your face. I don’t even notice that you are ripe for retirement because you are aging slowwwly and gracefully. Your hubby deserves a gold medal for being supportive.
Thanks for sharing. I only have 3 teen-agers whom we are very proud of; also a supportive husband and GOD to talk with all the time.
All the best.
How sweet! I think I’m starting to like this blog more than J. Angelo’s. Hehe.
Hi, Dine!
Didn’t know you already retired. How I envy you. I took a one-year special leave without pay to take care of my 8 children which I have neglected for 23 years. Wish I could have a longer leave but as you know it is very difficult to have it approved.
I’m very thankful that I was given the privilege to do so. I am going back next week to continue working. Hopefully I wouldn’t have to stay until 60.
Your motherhood article is very inspiring. Sometimes when things go wrong with the children, a mother can’t help but feel or ask herself where has she gone wrong. No amount of success in career can ever make up for failure at home.
Parenting is the most challenging but rewarding role one can play or be responsible for. Imagine being able to shape, inspire, support, motivate an individual.
More power to you and keep on writing.
edna
[...] 6 weeks from my first blog, now Anna and Toe have tagged me for a meme (remember Sexy Mom – Bared?) on what blogging has done for me. [...]
[...] I may not see my friends more often these days, now that I have retired. But somehow I have left them a legacy—my popular motto, “A happy home is better than a clean house”. [...]
I should have done this the time I crossed with this blog: to read the first post. That’s my practice.
Now, I can say that lucky are the children whom you bore. They have a mama like you who were able to follow their developments. Like my mother, though she was not able to finish college, she was able to support us in our needs, the maternal care needed in every family. Yet the sad story I always witness is the absence of mothers in the families of children whom I am with. Even the love and guidance of a father is not with them, mga absente parents. I realized, they just don’t need material care from generous people, but a quality time they needed, to listen to them. If anybody is interested to work with these kids, please extend your time with them.
Congratulations for being the best mom that you are…how I wish my mom took care of us the same thing you did and still doing to your kids before leaving us to work overseas. Both my parents are working abroad. I’m the only girl in four siblings. I always pray that if one day I become a mother, I’d be able to give the best love and care for my child.