The D Spot

From now until Wednesday, let me take a blog silence in honor of this baby boy, who, for 6 weeks brought joy to the family.

For those who wish to join us in commemorating Joseph Michael’s first birth anniversary, the schedue of Masses in his loving memory are found HERE.

On Wednesday, our Joseph Michael would have been 1 year old—we would all have been celebrating with this cute little boy, who would have taken his first step, said his first words, and filled our days with his smiles and merry laughter.

There would have been lots of possibilities, celebrating his birthday at McDonald’s, Shakey’s or a club house, after a family Mass at UP or Pentecost or Claret church. Sisters, 5-year old Pia and 3-year old Cate would have been helping him blow his solo candle. Boy toys would have been mixed with those of the girls (Michael has a brown pony and red Ferrari). Pia and Cate would have taken their time helping him open his gifts, with uncles BA, Vince, Alan Jr and Jay and aunts Monica, Chato and Pauline doting on the 3 of them. Lolos Alan and Caloy and Lolas Liz and Bei would have been beaming with joy, talking about perhaps the quirks that Michael has taken after Dad, Angelo. Mom Caren would have shown him off with pride and joy to family and friends, Dad Angelo would have taken pictures, and I the ever doting lola would have taken videos of the happy occasion.

But as the day comes nearer and nearer, there is this mixed feeling—a gaping hole in the heart, a certain sadness yet an acceptance with resignation that Michael is not of this world anymore. That God knows when best to take back anyone of us. Humans as we are, despite knowing that Michael is already in heaven, in the bosom of the Father, in the company of angels and Mama Mary, we still cry as much as we can, and miss him with all our hearts.

How we cherish those few days that Michael was with us. We would have wanted to stop the hands of time then, so as not to feel the deep pain, the immeasurable pain at the pit of our stomachs, driving us all crazy, but we could not. Life has to go on, and on, and on…

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JOSEPH MICHAEL—you must be having fun in heaven, while watching over us. We will still buy your cake, buy your balloons, and be with you. You will continue to be our pride and the love of our life.

Am sharing here a picture with Michael that I have always treasured.

And finally, let me repost here Angelo’s and Caren’s poem, when they finally sent Michael off and released him to the Father in heaven, and my poem of HOPE.

Joseph Michael (our Angel)

You came to us
God’s loving gift
Our baby boy
Our source of joy.

You gave us love
The purest kind
Your perfect smile
Your touch so mild.

We had our hopes
Our dreams, our plans
Until one day
God reached out His hand.

He called you home
He needed you
To join His host of Angels
So mighty, so strong.

You said, “Yes Lord.”
Then bid us good bye
“I’ll watch over you
From heaven up high.”

Dear Joseph Michael
Our baby, our Angel
You are God’s gift to us
And you are our gift to God.

We love you,
Daddy Joseph Angelo
Mommy Caren Marie
Ate Sofia Bernice
Ate Agatha Clarisse

Joseph Michael G. Racoma
20 August-3 October 2007

.

HOPE
as certain as the sun sets, so will it rise the next day
the pain in our hearts may go away, it may stay
they say that time heals, but for how long?
i wait, we all wait, but right now it is a pain so strong
embedded into the recesses of our very beings
the tears may have dried but still there are things
that we cannot fathom but try to accept
all that is left are memories in our hearts best kept
reminding us that no matter how short
they were still happy moments for all they are worth
and we can only be thankful when we look back
to the innocent smile and the warmth, it was pure luck
life has to go on, and slowly we rise from this deep fall
love will keep us together, we hope, again we will be whole
yes, the pain in our hearts may go away, it may stay
but as certain as the sun sets, so will it rise the next day.

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